ALL ALONE IN A COLD SEA : The United Kingdom has not gone batshit crazy, that much is obvious, it’s merely having an extended identity crisis. From which it will clearly recover in good order and everyone will be pleased with it.
The decision to keep a prominent monarchy and have the majority of the elected government be people of inherited privilege has in no way caused a conflict psychologically between what overblown, entitled nonsense the country’s rulers are weaned on and reality in the 21st Century world. For those not born to rule, the grand palaces they govern from compensate for what was missing in their early years as they struggled out of state schools and into the arms of the Tory Party.
Happily for the befuddled citizens of the shrinking island estate wedged between the North and Irish Seas they have a Prime Minister who is extremely capable of denying reality and doing whatever the hell he likes. Mostly because unseen forces profit from it.
The young of the island may feel a little lost, with all the upheaval of recent years. But that is just a fitting punishment for being young. Normally it’s a wedge of older voters who feel confused and lost as the world moves on and their minds calcify. Not in Blighty! Here the frozen neurone has taken back control.
But it won’t do to forget the aspirations of the upcoming generations entirely. They need to be guided, a hand held as they step along the suddenly different paths of Brexitannia.
“We will soon be banning smart phones for anyone who is not a Party member,” a 10 Downing Street source told LCD Views. “Which means for the great unwashed, as a rule of thumb, anyone under sixty. We’ll also be bringing back pre-decimal currency.”
The return of pounds, shillings and pence will do more than any other measure to help the youth adjust to living on an isolated rock, as the world churns on unseen beyond its borders.
“They’ll be so occupied trying to work out how to pay for this week’s bread ration they’ll forget that once there was a world with greater horizons. And they’ll have the Prime Minister to thank for that.”