Trump presidency exposed as Sacha Baron Cohen stunt

The election in November 2016 of four times bankrupt real estate tycoon Donald Trump as the 45th president of the United States has been exposed as little more than a clever TV stunt by controversial English comedian Sacha Baron Cohen.

Confronted outside the White House yesterday, out of costume and out of character, Cohen was quick to accept that the game was up.

“You got me, I is been exposed, I is not really da president,” he conceded, lapsing nervously into the pseudo Jamaican patois of his earlier creation Ali G.

Pressed on how he was able to perpetrate such a stunt, sailing through the Republican primaries without even his closest advisers realising he wasn’t really Trump, and was in fact a nice Cambridge educated Jewish boy from north London, Cohen was more expansive, albeit simultaneously lapsing into the pseudo Kazakh manglish perpetrated by his faux Kazakh Lothario character, Borat Sagdiyev.

“You think me president more ridiculous than failed builder with orange face and bad wig and wife look like number four prostitute in Kazakhstan? Was easy, piece of peasy,” he laughed.

“Mind you daughter, she more like number two..Mmmmmm good sexy time…” he added, explaining,  sotto voce and for once out of character, that spoofing the Republican Party and most of the US population had actually been embarrassingly easy.

“Vats up…it vos like the more ridiculous I made the character, the more they luffed him – I almost expected to find der whole country masturbating over me,” he minced Germanically, adopting the outrageously camp persona of his Austrian fashionista Bruno.

“Even Sarah Palin…. and zats no larzzing matter,” he winced.

Reverting again to his normal speech Cohen explained that adopting the persona of a deranged orange faced narcissist and playing the role all the way to the White House and through 18 months of cast changes and monumental screw ups had not been easy.

“Imagine if America really was a dictatorship, with rigged elections, where 1% of the of the people have all the nation’s wealth, where I cut taxes to make all my friends richer, ignored the needs of the poor for health care and education and got to torture all the foreign prisoners and migrants…” he spat, morphing seamlessly into the pseudo Middle eastern vernacular of bearded potentate Admiral General Aladeen.

” You could use the media to scare the people into supporting policies that are against their interests, and no one would complain, especially not Sloppy Steve Bannon,” he roared.

“Let’s face it, the surprise is not that no one noticed before, it’s that anyone has noticed at all….other than Vladimir Putin that is …” he winked.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *