LCD Views can exclusively report today that little known digital television channel, Channel 4, is to premiere an expose which reveals that the entirety of British politics has been faked since 23/06/16.
“That’s actually fake news right there,” a producer at the up and coming channel told us, “the fakery really started after the Conservative victory in the 2015 GE and the passing of referendum legislation that in hindsight was clearly designed for gerrymandering and hijacking if even a narrow victory in a so called advisory poll was achieved. Oh, achieved through criminality and foreign interference by dark money and mass social media manipulation.”
But why haven’t the government acted to expose all that?
”You mean the government that’s attempting to profit from it?”
Oh. What about the official opposition? They must be bloody furious about the faking of an entire parliament just pretending to govern in the national interest?”
“You mean the ‘we respect the result of the referendum’ official opposition striving for a Brexit that um, ah, protects workers’ rights, jobs and investment?”
Are you accusing them of being in on it too? If that’s the case you should bog off and join the Tories!
”That’s a vote winning electoral strategy. Especially if you’re faking your opposition to government policy while supporting the delivery of it in principle.”
Well, at least the cross party talks on a Brexit compromise show an end to the farce. That’s mature politics.
”You’re talking about May and Corbyn sitting down to agree a deal that will destroy both of them if they do?”
Oh. We’re fcuk’d aren’t we?
”No. We have to get out and vote. First at the local elections in May. Then at the European Parliament elections late May. Then at the GE in August and finally at the confirmatory ballot on Brexit in early October.”
But who should we vote for?
”Anyone who isn’t lying through their teeth.”
Short list then!
”Currently, but if people vote for the honest brokers the list will lengthen every day.”