“The all powerful Conservative Party 1922 committee is to be renamed the 1822 committee as soon as I am PM,” JRM tells his party and thus LCD Views and the world.
”As I remake the party in my image of affected and infective antiquity, we will all do well to remember a year when there was not universal suffrage, even for low born men, let alone the tender vessels God supplied for men to procreate with.”
Other changes expected to be made by JRM PM will be the return of capital, corporal, temporal and spiritual punishments to be administered by way of beatings with the bible.
”As many beatings as required to reunite the lost lamb with the flock.”
The civil service will still be allowed to exist, but will better understand that its role is one of support for the governing party.
”There will no longer be a need to leak unfavourable reports and assessments to the press, because I will be dictating all documents and the press will be abolished.”
We asked our political scientist what he thought the future was now holding with the revolution occurring under Mr Rees-mogg?
”The future is holding something smelly and sticky it’s desperately trying to shake off its hands, I say.
But if I were you I would welcome the rise of Jacob to the top of the rabid pack of pure breeds that is currently the sum of the Conservative Party.
i year most of the moderate female Conservative MP’s are running for the hills and all those people who say, why don’t the British act? The French would be rioting by now and bring down the government.
JRM PM will give those people a granted wish.”