Liz Truss vows to “Blame Brussels” for results of 12 years of Tory policies

LIZ FOR LIZ : The UK and EU can look forward to business as usual once the decrepit cult that runs Blighty chooses its third PM without a GE in six years.

The ability of the Conservative and Unionist Party to just decide who runs the country is one of the wonders of the Westminster system, regardless of how much damage each successive useful idiot chosen by the old bores does. The public would only mess it up if they got involved, just look what they’ve done since 2010! The Queen just nodding along is the icing on the cake.

“Liz is looking forward to photos with Liz!” a Liz Truss insider told LCD Views. ”Maybe they can even be Instagram friends? They could govern via social media together and get rid of Parliament. It’s just a wasteful rubber-stamp generating red tape anyway. Imagine likes and shares of double Liz?! OMFG. Blighty is back! Take that Argentina and whoever else Thatcher didn’t like! You know Liz is Thatcher? You know that right? Does Liz know? Not Liz. The other Liz. They can’t wait to be together.”

And be together they look certain to be, even if it’s only the occasional photo to show just how things deteriorated for the Queen at the end of her long reign. Truss won’t have to wait so long though, it’ll be going wrong from day one.

“It’ll be Brussels fault,” the insider adds. ”Just look at the state of the place today! And it’ll be Brussels’ fault tomorrow. It’s the modern Conservative way.”

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