BUILD BACK BLATHER : The dust is settling on the abandoned canapes and the last tortured strains of karaoke are spasming in the sticky corners of a Manchester function room with the dead skin cells lost during the frenzied Torygasm. The success of the eternal Tory project has been celebrated for another year.
“Of course it never ends,” a partied out 10 Downing Street source told LCD Views. “So long as people are inventing new things, developing novel industries and ideas there will be other’s work to appropriate and pretend it is your own. That is where the profit lies. Take the endeavour of someone else’s life and crack it open like a nut to eat what is inside. Discard the shell. Ignore their baffled eyes. The day to day work of Toryism is on a higher plane. You can see its contrails on high. Blood red blue blood. Pass the caviar darling. Prepare the blood transfusions….”
The higher plain where the work of centuries goes on. Taking the fat from the lamb while the lamb struggles on. Baffled eyes. Distorted nostrils. It eats the meagre grass at its feet while its foul shepherd carves away its flanks. Again and again. The EU almost ruined it. What with its guaranteed minimum standards and rights. Brexiter and Lexiter joined together to set that right. Embrace Brexit they say, so I can continue to fight for you safe with my public pay. Who is the greater devil? The one who comes in the night or the one who stands there like a fucking doorstop to let the devil in?
“Not just anyone can be an MP,” the source muses, finger trailing around the lipsticked edge of a fractured champagne flute. Dust motes in the reflected sparkles of a disco ball. Bones at the source’s feet. Bones of an aspiration albatross taken from the back of someone born dirt poor and chained in the womb. Ring through its beak. Then drag it to the dance floor and slaughter it amongst the tight circle of the clan. Chant “UC cut!” as the last embers of hope die in the mythical creature’s eyes. Poverty is motivational, right?
“What next I wonder?” the source of wonder. “We need a high wage, high skill economy. HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!”
Prepare the sacrifice. Build back blather. Batter the poor and fry ’em.