The referendum result. The last even vaguely valid reason to Brexit is under threat. Not from contradictory evidence this time, it is a victim of its own success. Naturally, the government has stuck its fingers in its ears and gone “La la la”.
£350m a week for the NHS? Exposed immediately as a lie. Millions of migrants swamping the UK because Turkey is about to join the EU? No it isn’t, and we can control migration perfectly well as it is. Take back control? Yes, let’s go and beg the EU for an an emergency Brexit extension or two. June 30th? Pretty please? No? Oh OK then, 31st October if you insist.
Yes, it’s all gone so well. But, whatever else, we will always have the referendum result.
Naturally, this suits Nigel ‘No Manifesto’ Farage right down to the ground. “We voted for Brexit, and I will deliver Brexit!” he told his latest rally, an audience of several old folk, their dogs, and the entire BBC Current Affairs team. “No other promises to get in the way, just Brexit, and then I will write the manifesto later to reflect what actually happens, and claim that I just ‘lost’ it!”
“There is no way we can consider an inquiry into the referendum,” explained Brexit apologist Finn Gersinthetill. “That would mean reconsidering the whole rationale of Brexit, and Brexiters don’t do introspection.”
But what if the referendum was corrupt, illegally run, and voters were targeted with dark money advertising after their online data was fraudulently abused?
“That would mean admitting that Brexit is nothing but a massive con,” replied Gersinthetill. “So Brexit would have to be cancelled, and we would all look like numpties who couldn’t organise a piss-up in a brewery.”
It’s well known that the referendum was a complete farce.
“All the more reason not to waste time and money on an inquiry!” said Gersinthetill triumphantly. “So long as it isn’t official, we can pretend it’s all OK until it’s over.”
They think it’s all over? It should be, but we are currently playing extra time…