We’ve survived self-inflicted national disasters before, claims Brexiter

Brexiters are getting more gung-ho about a No Deal Brexit every day. Cheerful wartime metaphors are the order of the day. We’ve survived worse, we’ll pull together. That sort of crap.

Meanwhile the mask has slipped so far that there is no longer the slightest attempt to disguise the lies. Brexiters now admit that Brexit is a self-inflicted national disaster and expect us to applaud.

LCD Views spoke to Brexiter bigmouth Lee Vingona-Jetplane about this latest pronouncement. “The British are at their best under conditions of great hardship,” boasted Vingona-Jetplane. “No Deal Brexit will create the conditions under which the true British spirit can emerge.”

It’s well known that people of any description pull together in times of strife, but is it worth destroying the economy simply to evoke misplaced nostalgia?

“Absolutely!” declared Vingona-Jetplane. “While the plebs are busy foraging for food, nobody will notice me and my chums buggering off with all the money.”

This phrase ‘self-inflicted’ bothers me. How many times has this country wrecked itself voluntarily?

“Many, many times,” replied Vingona-Jetplane. “It’s in the Conservative Party constitution. Why else would we privatise everything that moved? Or drag the country into wars, or impose a three day week? Every time it’s an opportunity for party members to profit, so where’s the harm?”

Vingona-Jetplane disclosed that he was so dissatisfied with his own party, which persisted in trying to reconcile Brexit with reality instead of just getting on with it, that he was thinking of setting up his own party.

“Yes, a proper Brexit for the few, not the many, party,” he said. “And no, I’m having nothing to do with that ghastly Farage character! Despicable chancer, trying to muscle in on our territory.”

We will get through it. We always do. So long as there are enough wage earners left to support Conservative party members, all will be well.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *