A spokestrooper for the influential parliamentary group the ERG has confirmed the group’s special calendar for 2019 has been correctly printed to reflect U.K. going back in time.
”1939 is where we want Britain in 2019,” Lodaf Thiler 2nd told LCD Views, “with the exciting possibilities of a no deal Brexit within grasp we felt it time to stamp a boot down to signify where the country is headed with our strangulation of the executive. And we all know what happened in 1939. A fantastic year for nationalism in Europe. We aim to emulate that so closely you’d think you were in a time machine.”
Aside from the revealing date, other features inside the calendar give subjects of Britannia a heads up on where they are taking us.
”Inspirational figures from the first half of twentieth century history have their birthdays celebrated,” Thiler trills, “Mussolini, Hitler, Moseley and so on. Oh and Spode. Oh and Stalin as a nod to one of our key overseas supporters.”
Also in the calendar will be strong dates that the ERG have identified through occult means as the best for copulation and conceiving a proper patriot child.
”Don’t waste the seed of the master race,” Thiler warns, “we need to breed, breed and breed to ensure the future population of the United Kingdom is the right one. Then we need to get most of them sacrificed for the glory of all. Certain groups will be sterilised to ensure the gene pool is pure though. As gene pools of superior populations have remained down through the millennia.”
Copies of the calendar will be made available and at a knock down price.
”Each day of 1939 is going to cost the public purse a pretty penny in lost tax revenue. To make up for this we’re going to forcibly seize the assets of families whose knees aren’t proper British knees and use those funds to give the calendars out for free to everyone.”
Any other advice?
”Yes. More to do with knees. Get on them and practise staying on them. It’s where the ERG fathers of the UK’s future want all of you, each and everyone.”