CHEAP AT HALF THE PRICE : GREAT NEWS TODAY for people seeking to buy themselves a piece of the UK’s world beating democracy with the launch of Peer2Peer.
“Peer2Peer is a revolution in access to the inner workings of British parliamentary democracy,” a 10 Downing Street press release reveals. “With just a few simple steps anyone can open an account on our new world beating site and get the peerage they desire.”
Owning a seat in the House of Lords is the new “must have” acquisition for anyone who already “has it all”.
“On Peer2Peer you aren’t limited to buying life peerages for yourself you can also SAVE CHRISTMAS by entering the BARGAIN BASEMENT ZONE and pick up a knighthood for someone you love. Peer2Peer makes unelected, representative democracy truly accessible for anyone who wants in.”
But Peer2Peer won’t just be the preserve of the ultra-wealthy looking to purchase peerages and other honours, there will also be a swap and cash out room for those who have decided it’s time to move on.
“Peer2Peer’s preloved room will allow owners of ermine to sell or trade their peerages with others. If you’re facing a financial squeeze and want to liquidise some assets then the PRELOVED ZONE is the right place for you. Or maybe you want to collect a set of peerages? Just open the app and see who is selling today. Peerages can be sold at a fixed price or auctioned just like on Ebay!”
The only restriction to opening an account is you must be a proven Tory Party donor.
“So long as you’ve donated a penny to the ruling party you can open an account. You’ll receive a link to download the software and if you’ve already hit the minimum threshold of £3m your avatar will be blue lit. If you’re under that if will be red. But don’t fret. The moment you pass the donation threshold your comic character will turn Tory blue.”
Peer2Peer – it will have your neighbour’s green with envy. Sign up today and receive a free copy of the Magna Carta.
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