BY HIS MISDEEDS WILL HE BE REMEMBERED : U.K. Prime Minister Boris Johnson is said to be in crisis Zoom talks today with the Home Secretary.
It’s rumoured that Ms Patel has been texting the Prime Minister “non-stop” over the weekend as it dawned on her she is going to have to actually facilitate the “bringing of endangered human beings to the U.K.” and will have to wait until the media spotlight fades before “attempting to deport them”.
Mr Johnson has been reportedly keen to avoid talking directly with his Home Secretary on the subject of Afghanistan as he’s busy “making a new Afghanistan policy out of empty wine boxes” and wanted to let the craft glue set hard first. But in the end he has had to relent. It was either that or “buy another burner phone and keep the number from her”.
The crisis talks are not set to find a solution though as that would require “empathy, compassion and forward thinking”, which are not qualities either were raised to power to “utilise”.
The impact on the word’s vulnerable people from electing idiots to power in Britain has already been displayed by the cuts to foreign aid during a global pandemic, and Johnson going along with Trump on “whatever”.
One potential saving grace of the crisis is the potential for the humanitarian disaster in Afghanistan on “our watch” to distract for “two, maybe three days” in the U.K. from the steamrolling Brexit crisis.
“The pandemic can only hide the harm of Brexit for so long. Perhaps an international calamity can lift some of the slack?” a 10 Downing Street body snatcher told LCD Views.
Meanwhile, pressure inside 10 Downing Street continues to grow to designate and redecorate another nursery room as the search for a “willing donor” to pay for it goes on.