ROLLING AWAY THE STONES: Nationalist fervour is starting to seep into Wales. The rocks that comprise Stonehenge came from Wales, and now Wales wants to take back control of its boulders.
“We proud Welshmen believe that Welsh monuments belong in Wales,” remarked henge hunter Craig Las. “The bluestones will return, and then we will rebuild Offa’s Dyke to keep the English out!”
Stonehenge has been part of the English landscape so long, that Las might find himself on rocky ground.
“Las is between a rock and a hard place,” replied English archaeologist Po Stoles. “He sounds like a heretic. Once upon a time they were stoned!”
We are caught between an immovable object and an irresistible force.
“Stoles can rock on,” grumbled Las. “People in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones!”
It is a matter of fact that some of the stones used to form Stonehenge were mined in the Preseli Hills in Wales. What is not known is how they rocked up in Wiltshire.
“They have been here forever!” claimed Stoles, clutching at straws. “And they are going to stay. Rock ‘n’ Roll? Well, these Stones ain’t Rolling nowhere!”
The atmosphere turned stone cold.
“The English stole them, obviously,” said Las, stony faced. “We Welsh patriots have always slated them as thieves. The English stole our land, our leeks, and our legends. I’m chalking this one up to them as well!”
Whether true or not, patriotic Stonehenge fans are examining the rocks for marks of origin. Any of the monoliths bearing either a George Cross or a Welsh Dragon will be identified, and used to establish the true ownership of the monument. Such rocks are known as flag stones.
Stonehenge is astronometrically aligned, like a giant timepiece or an elaborate sundial. The ancients who constructed Stonehenge clearly wanted to rock around the clock.
The clues lie in the ground in Pembrokeshire: the ancient footings of a stone circle. It’s like the Rosetta Stone for boulder chasers.
A row over rocks? Stone the crows!