The BBC has cancelled an edition of Have I Got News For You because Nigel Farage couldn’t be on the panel. He was too busy dominating an edition of Question Time instead.
Unfortunately HIGNFY instead featured Heidi Allen, who is far too remainy to appear unchallenged. All in the name of not trying to influence the electorate with EU elections looming.
This comes at the same time that BBC Light Entertainment has been kicked off Facebook. The social media giant still cannot distinguish between satire and fake news.
The BBC was unrepentant. “BBC policy is clear on the matter,” dissembled spokesbrexiter Lee Ningwright. “There must always be balance. Any traitorous remainer must be accompanied by an angry, shouting brexiter to ensure The People get the picture. Nigel Farage has a lot of free time, because he can’t be arsed to fight the evil EU from within. Besides, he has a gold-plated BBC pass and can come and go as he pleases.”
On a satirical show like HIGNFY though, a strong voice will be heard, but if they talk bollocks then the presenters will make fools of them.
“Let The People decide, in other words?” sneered Ningwright. “That’s not going to happen!”
A comedy show doesn’t need balance. It needs to be funny. Besides, Hislop and Merton can take down an idiot faster than you can say John Humphrys.
“Which is why Nigel went on Question Time instead!” crowed Ningwright. “He can say his piece unchallenged to a properly sympathetic audience composed of a balanced selection of soft and hard Brexiters.”
Where now for the BBC, which is so deep in Farage’s pocket that it cannot broadcast a current affairs programme without him?
“We are trying to capture the mass market audience, readers of the Daily Express,” replied Ningwright. “Who run a piece on Nigel crashing his car and simply walking away.”
The perfect Brexit metaphor.