As Brexit day approaches faster than a speeding bullet, running away from a stationery gun (wood, paper or pencil), we can report that Westminster pollsters are predicting no less than 650 MPs are expected to belong to the new independent group in HoC by 10:59pm, 29th March, 2019.
“It still won’t be a party,” our pollster says, “as they’ll still be trying to pick a colour for the party logos. Some have said why not go with white? But Angela Smith didn’t start out so well and some would read the wrong message in that. She’s on behind the scenes duties now,
“Blue and red make purple. So that’s no good. Once they absorb the Libdems then red, blue and orange? I’d have to get my colour chart, but that’s probably brown? People would have fun with it,
I see the difficulties. At least they’ve got the gender balance nailed down right now. That’s a rare feat in British politics. Although, I guess that’ll change once more male MPs put their fingers to the winds.
“Yes. They’ll likely be allied to the Greens on many issues, so they could go for a striped colour. I’ve sent my ideas to them. Candy cane would be nice. But even without a banner they’ll still be the largest bloc in the House of Commons, in fact the only bloc.”
But wouldn’t they stop many of the headbangers joining them? After all, they left their respective parties to get away from the ERG, the Corbynistas and their handlers and enablers on both sides.
“Those are the same things. And as they’re not a party yet they can’t stop anyone joining them. Makes recruitment easier. Baby steps.”
What are the same thing?
“The ERG and the Corbynistas. They’re both after a good hard Brexiting. So on the most dominant policy issue facing the country, they’re the same, except for some difference to do with definite and indefinite articles. Just look at Hansard. Check out the voting records over time.”
But how can you be so sure that the independent group will be so large by 10:59pm, 29th March 2019?
“Because that’s a minute to Brexit. And believe you me, the moment Brexit occurs no politician in the UK will want to belong to a party that caused it. Not even the ones who caused it.”