A cross party committee of ultra, heavy, hard and completely f+cking deluded Brexiters have warned Remainers today that they’re running out of time to come up with a viable Brexit plan.
We asked the committee just how cross they were?
”Very.”
That’s very cross?
”Steaming mad.”
So you’re unhinged too?
”Like a broken door on a fridge in a back yard left to the foxes and brambles unhinged.”
So what is to be done about it?
”It’s the bloody remoaniacs. No imagination for how to make Brexit work. They’re just running down the clock until it collapses under the gravity of its own idiocy and greed and we’re not standing for it.”
You’re not standing for it any longer?
”No. we’re sitting down. We’re having a sit in.”
Where are you having the sit down-in?
”The listed address?”
It would be helpful to know where in case people want to bring you sandwiches laced with purgatives.
”Panama mostly. One address. Thousands of companies. Very effective.”
But you’re hoping to move the sit down-in to London?
”That’s the whole bloody point of Brexit. If these moaning EU tyranny lapdogs don’t get their thinking caps on fast and work out solutions to the unsolvable Brexit problems Parliament may take back control and stuff the whole con. It was a long con. We’ve invested a lot of time and energy, for years, to pull it off.”
Almost pull it off.
”We would have done it by now if the blasted Maybot and got her majority increased last year.
That’s the fault of treacherous remoaning remainiacs too. Lending all those votes to Labour thinking Corbyn would fight Brexit. Ha!
Corbyn being more powerful was part of the plan. Allegedly. Although I don’t know why Labour handed its entire voter database to Leave EU before the ref so they could target Brexit friendly Labour voters.
Who does know?
Corbyn was actually supposed to win the GE, we made the Tories manifesto so toxic! But no. Not enough EU moaners voted for him either. It was supposed to be a win-win even if we lost.”
This sounds a little confusing.
”A swindle is supposed to confuse its targets. But I don’t think the remainers are going to solve the problems we’ve created by not planning what came after any ref win.”
You’re sounding like me now. Doubting the project?
”It’ll still work. Just so long as all those people so obsessed with facts, reason and defending rule of law can be silenced before MPs find where their spines are.”
We better get to work fast.
”I’ve got a fag packet have you got a pen?”
No. I’m using a smart phone for this. Good luck. You’re running out of time.
”No. You are.”
To solve the problems you wanted and actively worked to create?
”That’s right. Stop moaning and get behind Brexit and push.”
Fat chance. Good luck. Tick tock.