A FRIDGE TOO FAR: The Big Dog is running scared. Afraid that his new best buddy Volodymyr Zelenskyy might stop welcoming impromptu visits, Big Dog has taken steps to install a kennel in Kyiv.
Brave Big Dog, afraid that his planned visit to Yorkshire might culminate in filthy northern booing, scarpered to the sanctuary of Ukraine. Brave Sir Big Dog ran away, again, meaning that another tranche of Tory loyalists finally realised that Boris Johnson is a big fat liar.
Naturally, scores of loyal Tory arselickers have lined up to support the PM. “Doncaster is a shithole, to be fair,” claimed Cole Minor, Red Wall MP for Hell, Hull and Halifax. “Kyiv is very nice this time of year, and the daily aerial displays of the Russian air force are not to be missed!”
Minor was by far from being the only MP panicked into writing ill thought out bollocks in a naked attempt to preserve his skin. This makes it almost certain that when Johnson falls, as he must do in the end, that Minor and his ilk will fall too.
The fridge over troubled war zones prompted also sent tabloid “journalists” into a frenzy of mental gymnastics. The Daily Telegraph was at the forefront of blaming Starmer, Blair, Corbyn, Atilla the Hun, Genghis Khan, and any other remainiac lefty they could think of for Johnson chickening out of facing his public in favour of a hastily arranged photo op.
The fridge was paid for, equipped and delivered at the expense of one of the notorious party donors. You never get something for nothing, so the wily donor e will have extracted a promise from Johnson to further screw the economy, so the donor may profit by betting against Britain.
Johnson’s minders must realise that he exploits everyone he comes into contact with, meaning that Zelenskyy will eventually “go rogue”, meaning that he has twigged what Johnson is really up to. Woof woof!