Downing Street to send the army in to solve army staff crisis called by sending the army in

FULL MENTAL JACKET : Alarming reports today that the already understaffed British Defence Forces are suffering from a staffing crisis that is preventing them performing their usual functions, such as being sent in to solve problems caused by Boris Johnson. Also the pingdemic, but that’s arguably also the fault of Boris Johnson.

Although it’s also crystal clear that Brussels is mostly to blame, but of course it’s the British who have to pick up the pieces. Luckily we have the armed forces to fulfil roles that would not normally be undertaken by the military of an industrialised country in peacetime.

No one should be in any doubt that we are still a perfectly normal, functioning representative democracy and not a cautionary tale of what happens when you let hard right think tanks decide your future.

“It was incredibly underhand of Brussels not to force us to train up the domestic work force to fill the gaps that would be created by Brexit,” a 10 Downing Street source told LCD Views. “They failed to prepare the UK for Brexit and now look at the state of it? It is essentially sabotage and explains why Mr Johnson was right not to extend the transition period.”

While it’s obvious that the blame for the lack of HGV drivers, builders, hospitality workers and now even Cornish ambulance drivers can be placed squarely at the feet of Macron and Merkel we still have to find the solution to the crisis they created.

“The army is the trusted go to solution for the empire fetishists in government,” the source explains. “We are confident that the staffing problems in the armed forces caused by many of them being tasked with delivering groceries can be sorted by sending the army in to sort out the army staffing crisis.”

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