FINE DINING IN THE MIND PALACE : Global Britons have bellies full of sovereignty thanks to the decision to remove the country from the 21st Century. Get the bunting out and keep it out for you are free!
Free of travel without roaming charges and the accompanying worry your mobile service provider doesn’t care anymore. Free of just hoping on a train or flight to the EU27 with nothing but an anachronistic burgundy passport in your pocket. Free of worrying about overspending on food at the supermarket. Free of the anxiety about whether or not your kids will choose to study in the Erasmus programme or take the patriotic decision to use Turing and the Falklands.
The days of impulse buying while getting your necessities are happily in the past, for the foreseeable future. How does it feel?
For some curious reason, for some, it doesn’t feel good. Change can be discombobulating, when you haven’t prepared, so the government is going to help.
A new billboard and print media campaign will help boost the morale of all Empire 2.0 citizens and get them in the right mental state for the new realities of Brexit benefits.
“Get Ready To Believe In Food” is to launch shortly with happy, upbeat fonts and colourful photos of actual food.
“There’s a chance some citizens may forget what actually fresh fruit and vegetables look like until the colonies hit full production and ship back to the fatherland,” a 10 Downing Street Propaganda Minister told LCD Views. “But all you ready need to eat is to believe in food! If your mind is full of what we’re fishing out then you’ve nothing to worry about.”
Just like making a success of Brexit, reality is of no use, just believe!