NO FOETUS IS AN ISLAND : Controlling Britain’s borders has never been easier since the country sensibly took back control from the tyrannical EU and today breaks the news that Priti Patel’s Home Office is relishing its new found global super power.
The runaway success of the Hostile Environment stands as one of the greatest legacies of the May/Cameron era with its snappy catchphrase “Citizens of Nowhere” fingered by some as the moment the U.K. really took back control of negotiations with the EU. Now Priti Patel is taking the Home Field advantage and driving it into foreign soils.
“Operation In-Utero De-Porto is the next stage in the globally recognised push to rid the U.K. of unwanted peoples. You know the kind, they come to the country and steal jobs. Jobs which right thinking Britons should be doing. Thanks to Brexit we’ve 100’s of 1,000’s of job vacancies now which just shows how successful your government has been pursuing Nigel Farage’s priorities,” a Home Office spokesman told LCD Views.
In-Utero De-Porto has been given “a name that sounds both Latin and Latin” the spokesman explains so that “forrins can better understand it” and has already seen thousands of newborns across the EU issued with pre-emotive deportation notices.
“Those babies know that if they come to Global Britain they’ll be going right back out again. It’s how we will build Empire 2.0. Soon we will be expanding the scheme to issue notices to unborn job thieves and potentially even individual spermatozoa and ovals before they join. You can never go too far when it comes to nipping job crime in the bud.”
But some critics within the Tory Party have expressed alarm at the scheme.
“It’s been misreported that we’re upset over the loss of small but vigorous children for field work and chimney sweeping. Changes to UC will ensure a ready domestic supply of the needed staff,” Swivel Eyes Loon MP told LCD Views.
“What we are really upset over is robbing future Conservative MPs of the chance to persecute people who moved to the U.K. perfectly legally before having the rug pulled from under them. The lost years of mental stress and despair, and the money shakedown that now won’t happen, shows we need a system that lets them in first. Then we punish them.”
Global Britain – You don’t need to wait to come here before being told Leave means Leave.