STRONG AND STABLE SLOGANS : HOT on the HEELS of the SEX scandals and ministerial marriage BUST UPS the governing Conservative Party of England has been hit with a furore over its proposed new slogan.
The party of government has slowed its slogan production noticeably since genius, wonder, megabrain Dominic Cummings left Mr Johnson’s employment to pursue his lifelong ambition of winning the “No Shit Sherlock Awards” by revealing nothing that surprises anyone. And it seems the Cons are missing his magic touch when it comes to snappy, brain fogging catchphrases.
“It’s bafflingly long,” a 10 Downing Street insider told LCD Views, “it’s almost like an act of sabotage. How are our supporters going to process all that? It’s a far cry from the genius of Get Brexit Done! Three words. That’s all you need to take absolute power and keep it.”
However party insiders with a better handle on nuance appear to have other reasons for disliking the new slogan.
“They think it’s too honest,” the insider admits. “Vote Tory – It could be the last thing you do? It’s a clear reference to our pandemic policies and the one or two avoidable deaths that have happened as a result.”
Whether or not the people responsible for the new slogan will agree to modify it isn’t exactly clear though.
“They must be chasing the Freudian Slip Award? Mind you, given Mr Johnson’s announcement regarding the 19th of July I don’t think they’ll win it. We’re no longer concealing what we think of the value of the average voter’s life.”