FUHRERAGE : PEOPLE UP AND DOWN THIS GREAT LAND are reportedly FURIOUS AGAIN today about whatever it is we’ve decided they should be FURIOUS ABOUT!
The news that people are furious is exactly the same as the news that people were FURIOUS yesterday. The difference being today it’s a different concocted, culture war bollocks to stop people BEING FURIOUS about the 130,000 preventable pandemic deaths.
“PEOPLE ARE RIGHTLY FURIOUS!” a contact at Gammon Daily told LCD Views.
“Which is the way we need them to be. If they weren’t furious about whatever it is we’ve told them to be furious about they maybe furious over tax havens. Or social justice. Or structural racism. Or the lowest state pension in Europe. OR CLIMATE CHANGE AND THE PETROCHEMICAL INDUSTRY. Or the absolute calamity of their government and its liars lying all the time about lying. BUT WE LIKE THE GOVERNMENT as THEY WORK FOR OUR BOSSES. SO YOU HAVE TO BE FURIOUS ABOUT FLAGS!”
Happily however furious you are TODAY about whatever it is you’re supposed to be furious about today you’ll get the chance to be FURIOUS about something different tomorrow.
“Tomorrow we’ll tell you to be furious about MARXISTS ON THE FOOTBALL PITCH. Or Harry and Meghan. Or bloody Corbyn. Or GOD DAMN STARMER ALWAYS BEING RIGHT ABOUT THE PLAGUE. Anything so long as you’re not FURIOUS about all the ministers found to be breaking the law and NO ONE DOING ANYTHING AT ALL ABOUT IT.”
STAY FURIOUS! But just don’t stay furious about one thing, otherwise you may start to try and do something about it.