TAKE THAT JUNKER IN YOUR BUNKER : The United Kingdom continues to burnish its cred as the MOTHER OF PARLIAMENTS in week two, post Brexit, not really Brexit [transition].
“Boris Johnson’s girlfriend-mistress-SPAD-virility prop with intriguing links to Russia is deciding who is Chancellor,” our source inside 10,11,12 and 14 Downing Street reveals, while having no idea what’s going on in Number 13. “Although that’s put his best mate Dom in a real foul mood yeah, and he’s saying Bojo Al pal, bros before garden tools man.”
Of course the real victim in all this is The Saj. Not only has he had to suffer being defenestrated by the mad blogger Cummings, now he’s got to wait until late in the week to see if his friend Carrie’s pull with the chief is sufficient to stop him being shuffled.
“It’s not just The Saj who is on tenterhooks,” the source continues, “according to the Mirror article used as the basis for this entire article, whoever the hell Ben Wallace is, he’s got the same anxiety dream while waking.”
What Brussels makes of this no one knows. But what we do know is that Global Britain is going to do things its own way. And that way is a mentalist’s ménage à trois in Downing deciding in a psychological game of twister who fills the UK’s great offices of state.
Talk about being governed by unaccountable, unelected elites. Not that Boris cares, he’s too busy in the basement designing another bullshit bridge.
#GlobalBritain, it’s a brand. Already soiled.
Smell the glove.