WTF ARE YOU THINKING : The Search and Rescue team hired by Kinnock, Flint and Hoey have called off the search for reasons why Labour MPs should support Boris Johnson’s toxic Tory Brexit Deal.
“Let me correct you there,” Head of Search and Rescue, Mr Jobs, told LCD Views, “it’s not a deal, it’s just a Withdrawal Agreement. The deal is to be negotiated after the withdrawal. A bit like Johnson in court facing proof he’s the father of a child he doesn’t want to acknowledge. And we couldn’t find any reason for any Labour MP to vote with Johnson. He’s made his bed, he should be made to lie in it, before being thrown out of it and shown the door.”
But supporters of the search hit back saying if reasons can’t be found for self-proclaimed socialist MPs to support a dodgy Tory deal, aimed at stripping democratised rights and private wealth off working people, than those same MPs would have to face up to their electorates.
“So?” Deputy Search chief, Mr Investment asked, “that’s part of the job description of an MP. Anyone who thinks continuing to morally validate Brexit, a project with no provable gains for ‘ordinary hardworking people’, the kind Labour claim to represent, is the right course of action needs to start searching for their conscience. And their backbone. Brexit has nothing to recommend it, unless you’re a tax dodger, and believe you me, we’ve searched.”
But the Labour MPs who are saying they’ll support Johnson’s ‘Deal’, even though it’s actually May’s Deal with a minus, are taking some convincing.
“What do you want us to do?” one demanded, “level with the voters we’re currently trying to baffle with a vacuous slogan of ‘getting Brexit done’ and potentially lose our seats if they won’t listen to the evidence?
“The proven Brexit ref electoral illegality, and proven broken promises of the Brexiters, and the fact it’s going to smash the country’s economy?
“We’ve been ignoring all that for years in the hope of our own personal political gain. Wrongheaded, but it’s late in the day to change now. We’re supposed to put the people first? That’s a bit tricky now.”
Well, any Labour MPs minded to support Johnson in his rush to avoid scrutiny and get Brexit done (well, started, it’ll be years in the doing), you’ve your place in history to write. It’s your choice.
And don’t get us started on the ex-Tory MPs who are saying they’ll back Boris. There’s no cure for a full frontal Brexit lobotomy it seems…