Farage claims the Breaking Point poster was his manifesto

Nigel ‘No Mates’ Farage has finally revealed the Brexit Party manifesto. It was in plain sight all along: the notorious Breaking Point poster.

The leader of the one-man band that is the BP has resisted all attempts to pin him down on policy. Let’s get into power first, then we will tell you what you voted for. It’s policy making, Brexit style.

But Farage also said he would reveal his manifesto after the EU elections. No manifesto has been forthcoming. “I didn’t say how long after the EU elections,” coughs Farage. “Quite honestly, I don’t see the need. We want to Brexit, and that’s about it. There will be rich pickings for my rich mates, and everybody will be rich. Apart from the poor, who can eat all that lovely freedom and sovereignty.”

That’s a bit rich. We deserve to know what the BP stands for.

“I’ll tell you what we stand for, making a stand, that’s what,” wheezed Farage. “We want to wrest power from the establishment elite and hand it on a plate to the global elite.”

And how do you plan to do that?

“By pointing the finger of blame at the blameless,” Farage spluttered. “Powerless people, foreigners, people who only exist in the minds of the small-minded and fearful middle Englanders. Tell those poor souls that the EU is planning to flood this country with undesirables, and shove an emotive image on a poster. There! That’s our manifesto.”

Unfortunately, it was a pack of lies, wasn’t it?

“I’m a Brexiter,” he responded magnificently, through a cloud of cigar smoke. “We don’t deal in facts!”

Nor in good taste. The poster, of course, appeared at the same time as the murder of Jo Cox, the first high-profile victim of Brexit. Was this mere coincidence, or an attempt to gain maximum publicity? Were the two events carefully coordinated? We will never know.

Is a bad manifesto better than no manifesto? Over to you.

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