WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN : Numerous Tory MPs have been in the press in recent days promising they’ll bring down their own government if it goes completely crazy. Reassuring words indeed.
“If this isn’t crazy I don’t know what is,” our only remaining sane analyst, Mr Brain, says, “I advise these MPs to undergo immediate hearing and vision tests. They clearly can’t have seen too well what’s been happening for the last several years. They haven’t heard the news? The whole show is batshit.”
While Mr Brain is kind and gives the start of insanity as the 2015 general election, and the promise of a simplistic IN/OUT referendum, others push the date back to 2010 with the beginning of purely ideologically driven policy making decisions.
“I think, after further consideration, I’ll accept 2010,” Mr Brain agreed, following a furious debate inside my head, “and not just because I want to end this conversation and get out of here for lunch, before I go crazy.”
It’s not certain what it will take for the group of MPs, said to number twelve, to believe their government is nuts? If they don’t already think it is.
“You would have thought that the creation of a minister to oversee voluntary food shortages was the moment? Even for the most tolerant. But no. On they trudge, dutifully hoping that sanity will return, even while expecting Boris Johnson to form a government.”
LCD Views has some advice for the MPs. A stitch in time saves nine. Stop talking and act. Although the chance to save nine has already passed. Maybe you’ll save a few.
Or in the famous words of Jack Nicholson’s character, Jack Torrance, in ‘The Shining’, “HERE’S JOHNNY!”. And yes, we’re already past the moment he smashes in the bathroom door.
We’re at another of Nicholson’s classic films, ‘One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest’, but this time it’s not one, but all.