Fantastic news for lovers of accuracy in nomenclature today with the news that the Trading Standards authorities have moved to force the ERG to rename themselves just ‘Group’.
”They clearly haven’t done any research ever in the field of study they claim to be focused on,” Mr Just Foff, Trading Standards, told us, “although there’s ample evidence they do a lot of occult studies. I suspect they’ll soon be announcing a uniform and going off in search for the Arc of the Convenant, given recent statements by prominent members.”
Another area of concern in the name seems to be confusion over why they put Europe in their original name.
”Presumably it’s to misrepresent their motivations? Suitably vague enough for anyone to decide for themselves what it’s there for. Which is classic con artist playbook of course, although I’m only speculating. We did press them to explain but the mere mention of the word Europe caused most to shut down into a catatonic state. Presumably that’s why they have always just said ERG in the past.”
But at least they’re safe with group?
”Yes, they’re definitely a group, no doubt about that. A group of what you can decide for yourselves. We’re happy to allow them to leave that suitably vague.”
So how are they taking the news?
”I don’t think it’s registered with them yet. Most are so busy changing their positions on May’s deal, based on their own calculation of their chance for personal political elevation, that it hasn’t sunk in.”
Maybe a wholesale rebranding would be a good idea?
”Yes. If they were to rename themselves a Shower of Bastards, we’d have no problem with that.”