Anyone worried about what the barnstorming ‘Revoke Article 50 and Remain in the EU’ petition is doing to the already loosened bowels inside Downing Street can relax today, as they have a solution.
“The government is going to use Henry VIII powers to rename it to something better,” LCD Views Petitions Petitions correspondent reports, “and not a statutory instrument as we have falsely reported. We need to issue a correction as soon as we publish this incorrectly headlined article.”
https://petition.parliament.uk/petitions/241584
But what will they be renaming the petition?
“Clearly it’s going to be the biggest cry of enthusiasm from the electorate since both Theresa May and Jeremy Corbyn were returned to 10 Downing Street in 2017,” our correspondent explains,
“both with massively increased majorities, and a mandate to deliver the hardest of Brexit/Lexit’s, depending on who wins the game of Twister over it. So it’s only right that the government give the petition a name that respects the will of the people as expressed in the criminally corrupted, fraudulent opinion poll conducted a few years ago.”
This just sounds like representative democracy meshing nicely with plebiscites, so what’s the name to be?
“Well, some are demanding we get the Russians and a few American billionaires to run a referendum on what to call the petition, but others are saying there isn’t enough time and we should just phone up 55 Tufton Street and get them to blue sky dream it up.”
Both sound like democracy in action to us!
“I suspect the most likely new name will be ‘Back Theresa May’s Deal and Leave’, but if Labour front men are successful it will be ‘We really wanted Lexit all along, thank God Magic Grandpa is here’.”