Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II is said to be not amused today after some lackey from central government informed her personal security of plans to evacuate her, once everything goes to hell in a handcart with Brexit.
Our breathless royal correspondent has more, with one long sentence :
“The Queen, resplendent in a blue and gold, star studded gown, with matching hat,
”a gown, it is rumoured, although the photographic record from the period is patchy, once worn to executions by her ancestor Queen Elizabeth the One,
“and who began her long and glorious reign with weekly visits from prime minister Winston Churchill, who maybe a divisive figure for some, but is certainly better than the blue computer screen of death that is Theresa May, who the Queen now suffers for an hour a week with groans she is unable to stifle,
“was overheard muttering early this morning,
‘One didn’t see that on the side of a big red bus!’,
”when told of emergency plans being drawn up by government to evacuate her, once the food queues turn to violence five minutes after Brexit.”
But while the emergency evac plans, modelled on Cold War ones, are just sensible contingency planning by a responsible government, about to unnecessarily plunge a country into crisis, with the flaccid acceptance of the official opposition leadership on Brexit, there has been some controversy.
”They’re exporting her to Europe,” our correspondent informs, pale, trembling and worried who he’ll follow around fawning after, “we didn’t send the EU £350m per week before Brexit, and now let’s send them the Queen instead?”