Take that Brussels! Downing Street is heralding a new dawn for the British car industry today with the promise of a taxpayer cash injected, revitalised industry which will produce cars for every man, and some women, after Brexit.
“It’s to celebrate ARE independence from Brussels, Berlin and Tokyo,” underling to Greg ‘bright spark’ Clarke, Secretary of State for Something, told LCD Views,
“for too long the plucky British car manufacturer has been beholden to pay tribute to foreign overlords, but no more! Now we cry fetch that Merkel! Take that Macron, We’re quite able thank you very much Abe!”
The car will be designed and produced in the fully equipped car factories the global car industry intend to leave vacant and waiting in Sunderland and is to take its inspiration from British icons.
”It’s to really stamp Global Britain’s character on the car,” the underling explains,
“Greg has designed it himself, well, at least the outline, symbolically. Rover, because everyone loves a dog called Rover, the Log, because dog’s love leaving logs all over and a Union Jack as its emblem, because the Union will both survive, and thrive, after Brexit with centralised and sensible governance from Westminster.”
Production is expected to begin sometime this year after we’ve liberated the billions fleeced out of the overly generous British pocket from the ever grasping continental hand.
”There’s many ways to spend the Brexit dividend. We’re doing it all over. But one sure way to keep the British public on the move is to cry go fetch a Log! And it’s not just for post Brexit supper.”