With the US congress steadfastly refusing to fund his border wall, president Donald Trump has turned to 80s pop celebrities to help him sell the project to the US public.
White House spokesperson Thomas Dolby confirmed to LCD views Wednesday that the President had this morning entered a recording studio with members of 80s synth pop ensemble “The Human League” to add his vocals to a new version of their 1980 minor hit “Empire State Human”, better known to 80s pop pickers as “that bloody wall song”.
“The president feels that with their rousing chorus of ‘I want to be tall, tall, tall…As big as a wall, wall, wall…’, and backing vocals of “Fetch more water fetch more sand, BIGGEST person in the land”, The Human League have neatly summarised his motivation for erecting this much needed addition to security on our southern border,” he explained.
However he denied point blank that there had been any discussion with the band over a possible further collaboration to rerecord their global mega hit, “Don’t You Want Me Baby” as a on open appeal to Nancy Pelosi, speaker of the US congress, where the Democrat majority is refusing to release funds for Trump’s planned border wall.
“Frankly there’s more chance of the President turning buddhist and “Being Boiled“, he punned.
Pelosi, for her part, speaking on the steps of congress chose to neither confirm nor deny widespread rumours that she was herself was recording a duet with former “Human League” members Martin Ware and Ian Craig Marsh, better known as 80s synth pop hit factory, “Heaven 17”.
“All I can say at this point is ‘Brothers, sisters, we don’t need this fascist groove thang…” she smirked.