Planes were grounded at all twelve London airports today as emergency measures were taken after an Unidentifiable Pieing Object, or UPO, was seen hanging in the sky above the Palace of Westminster.
”The UPO has actually been over the Palace for a couple of years now,” our Westminster correspondent, Mrs Bubble, says,
“since the day David Cameron successfully dealt with the imperial minded, tax dodging fascists in his party by promising to call the EU referendum that occurred after mass cheating in June 2016.”
But while not a new feature, when in fact it’s standard political practice for many MPs to put little pies in the sky, this time it’s different.
”This time it’s different,” Mrs Bubble adds, unnecessarily, “it’s believed the spate of recent policy documents, or scribbled on fag packets, released by Brexit backing groups has lead to a pie so bloody huge it has begun to blot out the sun.”
That Jenkins clown saying “no one would notice” a No Deal Brexit, plus Raab blaming business for the impacts of Brexit on business, and Raab releasing more nonsense he claims is preparation for a completely unnecessary calamity he’s intent on creating, and McDonnell saying he couldn’t be arsed to fight a resurgent UKIP, but that’s okay because the hard right have clearly been beaten into retreat across the U.K. political landscape by having Con and Lab adopt one of their key agendas, all this has,
”birthed a monstrous floating nonstrosity that is anything but Pukka, or Greggs for that matter. Although I have it on good authority the taste of the pie in the sky is pork barrel.”
People are warned to believe what they see, but to have a plate and fork handy, with sauce if you like, for the inevitable moment when the gravity of logic brings the pie crashing down.
”Personally I’d bring a bucket and shovel,” Mrs Bubble said, “this monster is going to keep us all fed for years once it crashes to ground.”