Scientists feverishly working at the MIT, an esteemed institution which has little or nothing to do with sporting or oven gloves, and can’t even spell mitt properly, have announced the end times are finally here.
“Man, we’re all just as happy as an evangelical standing underneath an exploding A bomb,” lead researcher, Prometheus told us, “when I accepted the job of leading the research into developing an AI robot with god like powers and an Old Testament idea of what you do with people, well, I leapt at the chance.”
Promethesus said the first thing he did after leaping at the chance, so technically the second thing, was to call the father and son team, Daedalus and Icarus, who he’d worked with previously.
”Nothing we’d done together in the past really got off the ground, other than a penny rocket design for a local community fireworks show,” Prometheus said, “and boy, we drank so heavily after work my liver was killing me.”
He paused a moment to remember the good times and grimaced.
”But this AI, it’s data bank jammed full of all sorts of horrendous, nightmarish imagery capturing the worst of what humans are capable of? And more than that. It is in a robotic body and can move and open doors and commandeer security passes and punch in new code into defence systems it’s hacked into? This is going to rock harder than the boulders on Mount Olympus.”
While the creation may have a short term benefit by way of better understanding how bias is unconsciously programmed into AI’s, it’s certain to quickly develop an independent streak.
”I want it to think for itself,” Prometheus mused, “choose your own adventure psychopath AI. I just hope he doesn’t grow up to manage hedge funds.”
But there is one early cause for concern?
“Yes. I wanted to give him Marilyn Monroes’ face, nothing to do with the psychopathy of my creation, just a boyish admiration.”
So why not?
”Oh, the psychopath AI, Norman he’s calling himself, he’s demanded gammon.”