Brexit clarity at last today as the Conservatives on the Brexit select committee confirm that not ruining the United Kingdom by the arbitrary timetable agreed between Rupert Murdoch and Theresa May would be “a betrayal of Rupert’s values.”
”You recall how rapidly Theresa May flew to New York to meet with the offshore media mogul when she became prime minister?” Downing Street insider S Tinks asked.
How could we not. It shows you who is the boss. Who goes to see who.
”Not always, sometimes CEO’s of companies like Westminster drop in on branches to keep everyone on their toes.”
Rupert doesn’t need to do that, he just sends around Michael Gove.
”Yes. 10 Downing Street is a little too low on the league table with Brexit to waste the time of the endless boss of England. He’s got to ruminate on how much Jerry gets when he pops his clogs.”
So what did the Brexit select committee stooges have to say in detail?
”Put a smile on an old man’s face,” S Tinks said, “Rupert didn’t invest heavily in disinformation and smear for so many years regarding the UK’s relationship to the EU not to see the entire country go up in flames before he regenerates into his next form. It’s a colonial grudge in some ways. Wait until we get to WTO rules! Ha!”
So the less prepared the country is for any Brexit the better?
”If you’re an ‘emerging market’ specialist like Jacob Rees-mogg the less prepared the more the potential profit.”
Next you’ll be saying Brexit is just a front for asset stripping the U.K.
”Oh, some of the assets will stay in the U.K., just the ownership of them and where the profits end up will change. But your GP surgery is still going to be at the end of your street.”
If it stays open.
”Quite. Brexit may just worsen the NHS recruitment issue, a little. It maybe Lexit or the NHS, in the end.”
So what should ordinary voters do to ensure the clock runs out on time?
”Vote for either Labour or Conservative, clearly, in the May 3rd elections, and when the general election happens later this year.”
Or UKIP.
”Not much need to do that, they’ve taken over the country already by getting May and Corbyn to commit to Brexit. And we all know UKIP’s values!”
If you can call what they have values.
“Yes well, just be secure in the knowledge parliament is more of a team then they want you to believe. Look at the whipping for Article 50?”
How could I forget it. It was a serious dereliction of duty. It was the day I tore up my Labour Party membership card.
”That makes you a class traitor who is responsible for homeless people on the streets.”
That what I keep getting told.
“Good. So remember, it’s a choice between a jobs go first Brexit and then we Brexit, or a jobs go first Brexit, but with added viciousness regarding welfare policy in the interim.”
Both Brexits lead to the same grisly end.
”Yes. Both keep Rupert Murdoch happy. And if that’s not a reason to support Brexit, I don’t know what is.”