Honest broker and all round friend of the people Boris Johnson is to argue today Brexit is liberal if you forget how many racists love it.
In a move that will shock his critics, the minister of state, often regarded as liberal with the truth, will break from long held tradition and come clean.
”Let’s be clear, the will of the people must be obeyed,” Johnson will argue with the strength of a willy of the people suffering from sporadic erectile dysfunction.
”Many times throughout the last century of history in the first half of the twentieth century on the continental landmass of Europe we saw the result of obeying the will of the people and just imagine if mob populism had been betrayed?”
Indeed.
”Whether you voted to leave the gaggle of democracies that have lately enshrined so many rights for people in shared law it makes a neocon’s eyes bleed for that lost percent of profit, or you voted to stand against the rise of nationalism and the chaos and carnage it has always led to, it’s time to unite behind Nigel Farage’s vision of our future.”
This was best evoked when Nigel mirrored Nazi propaganda during the EU ref campaign.
”All of Britain now will join with one heart to shout go home at anyone who looks like they may not be English, which includes shouting at Scots, and say to the world, trust us, trade with us, ignore that we will do whatever makes Rupert Murdoch feel powerful in the autumn of his life.”
He will then say pifflefaffle and something about smiles for the remainder of the speech before lifting hearts by reminding all,
”Brexit is a liberal project,” saluting with a flattened hand raised high, “if you are a racist.”