Fears are growing in the temple of the high priests at Westminster that their ruler may have misread the Mayan calendar when seeking the date the world as we know it now ends.
“We really looked at it really hard,” temple novice Mordaunt advised LCD Views’ Make-it-up correspondent.
“We didn’t just pick 11pm 29/03/19 out of a hat you know. We cross referenced it with the calendar used by the empire across the water to make sure they knew that we meant business.”
It’s believed the preferred date was actually the 1st April 2019, but there were concerns that this day might lead to speculation the temple wasn’t serious because it would clash with an annual festival called April Fools Day.
“We’re going to have to do both the long and the short count all over again. It maybe wise to wait for further auspicious signs before deciding on the precise moment we destroy the old order and begin a powerful new magic kingdom. You know, comets in the sky, volcanoes under car manufacturing, tidal waves sweeping away trade at Dover, that sort of thing.”
But critics of the indecision have also weighed into the discussion by demanding they just end it all now and see what the empire across the water thinks of it.
“The best way to ensure we take all our treasure into the next world is to not give anyone any warning that we’re going at all, so they can’t escape.”
While there is clearly indecision in the temple corridors and the Mayan calendar will need to be consulted again, one thing seems certain, and that is a single day to celebrate fools each year may soon be 364 days too few.